Anchors, Not Chains: Why Values Must Evolve to Endure

The couch barely fit all four of us. Yet every Friday night for years, we’d squeeze together—two parents, two young boys, a pizza box, and a movie. It was our ritual, our way of honoring a value we held deeply: family time. For a while, it was perfect. Then life, as it does, shifted. The boys grew older, their lives filled with sports practices, friends, and independence. One Friday night, I realized something: clinging to this ritual as the only way to express family time would backfire. It would alienate the very connections we sought to nurture.

The value hadn’t changed—spending meaningful time together as a family was still central to who we were. But its manifestation had to evolve. That realization—that values are anchors, not chains—has stayed with me. It’s a lesson I’ve seen play out not just in family life but in the careers of leaders, the lifecycles of organizations, and formation…and downfall of social systems.

When values are treated as anchors, they provide stability while allowing for movement. They ground us without holding us back. But when values become chains—rigid, immutable, bound to past contexts—they risk becoming the very forces that undermine progress. To live by our values, we must honor their essence while adapting their expression to the present moment.

Values as Anchors, Not Chains

Values offer stability in uncertain times. They ground us in shared purpose, guiding decisions and actions. But too often, we mistake the expression of a value for the value itself. That’s when values become chains. We hold tightly to old rituals, old ways of working, old definitions, and wonder why they no longer serve us.

In my family, this tension was clear. Friday night movie nights were wonderful when the boys were small, but as their lives expanded, insisting on preserving that ritual would have destroyed the very connection we valued. Instead, we allowed the value to evolve. Family time became a conversation during a road trip, cheering from the sidelines at a game, or catching up when schedules allowed. The value remained constant, even as its expression shifted.

This same dynamic plays out in organizations and social systems. Values that remain static can’t meet the challenges of a changing world. To keep values alive, we must treat them as anchors—rooted in purpose but flexible enough to adapt.

How Values Become Chains in Organizations

Peter Robertson, the Dutch psychiatrist who introduced me to the AEM-Cube framework, once explained to me why executives often destroy their own companies. The very values that drive early success often become liabilities when held too rigidly.

Imagine a startup built on the value of speed. In its infancy, speed might mean quick, informal decisions made in the moment. But as the organization grows, those same practices can lead to chaos. To remain effective, the expression of speed must evolve—perhaps through streamlined processes or agile frameworks. Leaders who cling to past expressions of speed risk creating inefficiency, undermining the very value they seek to protect.

This isn’t just a theory. Research on organizational growth highlights predictable “crises of leadership” as companies mature (Greiner, 1972). What works in one phase becomes a barrier in the next. To navigate these transitions, leaders must reinterpret values to fit new contexts.

The Chains of Rigid Ideology in Politics

This same pattern is evident in our politics. Principles like “freedom” or “equality” have guided progress for generations. Yet, when interpreted rigidly—without adapting to modern challenges—they deepen divisions rather than fostering solutions.

Jonathan Haidt’s work on moral foundations theory shows how shared values like fairness and loyalty are understood differently across cultures and political ideologies (Haidt, 2012). When these interpretations harden into dogma, common ground disappears. Freedom becomes an excuse for neglecting social responsibility. Equality becomes a justification for stifling innovation. The values themselves aren’t the problem—it’s our unwillingness to reinterpret them.

Politics, like leadership, requires treating values as living principles. Freedom in the digital age might mean safeguarding privacy. Equality might mean fostering diverse forms of success. When we fail to adapt, values calcify, becoming chains that hold us back.

The Biology of Adapting Values

The tension between stability and flexibility is built into our biology. The human brain is wired for both—anchored in the familiar yet capable of profound adaptation. The default mode network (DMN), which governs introspection and memory, encourages attachment to rituals and past patterns. Meanwhile, the prefrontal cortex enables the flexibility to solve new problems and adapt to changing environments.

From an evolutionary perspective, values function as heuristics—simple rules that help us navigate uncertainty. Principles like “protect your family” or “cooperate with others” evolved to ensure survival. But just as species must adapt to shifting ecosystems, values must evolve to remain effective. When heuristics harden into rigid laws, they lose their utility, much like organisms that fail to adapt risk extinction.

Reinterpreting Values: A Practical Framework

How, then, do we ensure our values remain anchors, not chains? Here’s a simple approach:

1. Define the Core Principle. Ask questions like “what does this value truly represent?” For example, “family time” might mean fostering connection, not enforcing a specific ritual like Friday movie nights.
2. Assess the Current Context. Reflect on how circumstances have changed. What worked in one phase of life, business, or society might no longer fit the present moment.
3. Reimagine the Expression. Identify new ways to honor the value. In an organization, “speed” might shift from informal decision-making to streamlined processes.
4. Iterate and Reflect. Revisit your values regularly. Treat them as dynamic, open to ongoing refinement as conditions evolve.

Anchors That Endure

Years later, those Friday movie nights are long gone. My sons are young adults now, living their own lives. We see each other less often, but the value of family time remains. It looks different—a shared meal when schedules align, a group text full of updates and jokes, or a long phone call during a road trip. What hasn’t changed is the commitment to connection.

This is the secret to living by values without being bound by them. Values are anchors. They ground us, provide stability, and keep us connected to purpose. But they are not chains. They are not meant to hold us to the past. By honoring their essence while adapting their expression, we ensure that our values endure—and that they continue to guide us through life’s inevitable changes.

References and Further Reading

Greiner, L. E. (1972). Evolution and revolution as organizations grow. Harvard Business Review, 50(4), 37–46.

• Discusses the predictable crises organizations face as they grow, highlighting the need for values and strategies to evolve with context.

Haidt, J. (2012). The righteous mind: Why good people are divided by politics and religion. Pantheon.

• Explores moral foundations theory, showing how shared values like fairness and loyalty are interpreted differently across cultures and ideologies.

Kahan, D. M. (2012). Cultural cognition as a conception of the cultural theory of risk. In Handbook of Risk Theory (pp. 725–759). Springer.

• Examines how cultural values influence perceptions of risk and policy, emphasizing the challenges of rigid ideological frameworks.

Robertson, P. (2003). The dynamics of leadership in organizational ecosystems. Journal of Business Strategy, 24(4), 26–31.

• Explores how leadership behaviors and adherence to values impact organizational adaptability and survival.

Schwartz, S. H., & Bilsky, W. (1990). Toward a theory of the universal content and structure of values. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 58(5), 878–891.

• Proposes a universal structure of values and how they adapt to cultural and social contexts.

Sull, D. N. (1999). Why good companies go bad. Harvard Business Review, 77(4), 42–52.

• Introduces the concept of “active inertia,” describing how companies fail by clinging to past strategies and values rather than adapting to change.